Searching For- Lucky | My Dad Is A Dirtbag In-all... ((free))

To be “lucky” to have a dirtbag father is to learn the grammar of survival before learning the alphabet of love. The child of such a parent develops a hyper-vigilant emotional intelligence. They learn to read the subtle signs of an impending lie, to smell the difference between a beer buzz and a mean drunk, and to construct their own moral code from the wreckage of their father’s broken promises. While a “good” father might teach a child to trust the world, a dirtbag father teaches a child to trust only themselves. That self-reliance, hard-won and lonely, is the first stroke of bitter luck. It is the luck of the dandelion that grows through a crack in the asphalt—not a privileged plant in a manicured garden, but one that is immune to being stepped on.

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I stared at the screen. He was chaotic, selfish, and a disaster zone of a human being. To be “lucky” to have a dirtbag father